With each breath it becomes clearer that I have only now

just started to live, ungrateful for so long, each day arrived and left with my

unwillingness to accept that one of them could be my last.

I lived in the playgrounds of my past and in

the fantasies of my future as though the present was a hindrance to the dreams

of days that may never even arrive.

On

auto-pilot as I raced towards false notions of success, failing to appreciate

the beauty passing by in my rear view.

The gift of life, itself, was collecting dust from neglect forgotten on

a shelf, ignored as I chased material possessions that I believed would define

my worth. Mansions and Mercedes revered more than nature in all its glory, as

the pages of my life were filled with greed, until encountering the worst and

best of humanity helped me rewrite my story.

Seeing third world poverty up close helped wake me up, as I was

conditioned to think having nothing was a tragedy; until I looked closer and

realized that devoid of wealth, these people were far happier than the richest

men that I have met.

We are programmed

to reach higher, strive for more even when our cup is overflowing; this

ideology breeds an endless cycle of dissatisfaction.

Never happy because we are taught to try

harder than we already have, we begin to self-destruct under the incredible

weight of inadequacy.

We idealize the

elite for the fortunes they have amassed, and criticize the weak for the

success they seem to lack.

Asceticism is

no match for the American dream that is in reality a nightmare, the false

promise of wealth for all leaves us oppressed and unhappy.

I was merely content for far too long,

fixated on fame at any cost; the reminder of my own mortality through loss was

all it took to remind me of the many ways in which I am blessed.

To forget the miracle of life, that we

essentially die every night to be revived by the sunlight or that every atom

inside of me has a purpose that my ego chose to deny.

The only guarantee we have is that our hearts

will one day beat no more, each new day that I am revived fills me with awe and

gratitude for having been reborn.